The Glass Wall

Rummaging through some old books and diaries tonight, I found some poems and journals I kept several years ago. This poem written in my journal January 23, 1999 and the author is unknown but it made an impression on me enough to record it with my daily journal. For folks who like to read and like creativity, check out The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron 1995. I also had the companion book, The Artist's Way Morning Pages Journal: A Companion Volume. I kept the journal for awhile and have some favorite things tucked into it. I got this poem from another book but can't recall it by name. This poem is a perfect description of what PTSD feels like.


The Glass Wall

Surrounded by a glass wall
Seen only by myself
This cool exterior protects me,
Keeps me safe,
Holds the world at a distance
That I might observe it,
Yet, not experience the pain
Of its vulnerability.

Surrounded by a glass wall
Seen only by myself,
Your words I hear plainly, clearly;
The wall does not drown them out.
Inside this wall I'm screaming,
But it is lost and unheard
Reverberating within my little glass world.

Surrounded by a glass wall
Seen only by myself,
Clenching my fist in desperation,
I reach out to pound on the wall with my fist,
Ask for help, reach out~~
But, I resist;
Terrified by the sound of breaking glass.

author unknown
journaled January 23, 1999